REWIND’S Jock Jams Vol. 3.

Before you even ask, Hank Williams, Jr.: I am ready for some football.

Back in 2019, I celebrated the start of football season with a selection of classic jock jams. I may be biased, but I think that was a great idea. Then there was a plague, a racial justice reckoning and I guess, for some reason through all that, I forgot. Then I forgot again in 2021 and in 2022. But last year I did it again! It can be a tradition now.

The start of the NFL season is always a momentous occasion for me; MLB Opening Day is an American tradition, but there’s something especially satisfying about nine straight hours of football after a long, long offseason. Plus, thanks to the world’s failest failson John Fisher, baseball is dead to me and I don’t even have a sport to watch in the summer.

So, in the words of 2019 first round pick no. 2 (Unlimited), y’all ready for this?

House of Pain — “Jump Around”

I have no stats to prove it but I feel like this is more of a college football staple than an NFL one. Still, it counts.

It’s obvious House of Pain was writing a crowd interaction song. When the main riff of sorts starts, it’s a great cue to start jumping. There’s even a steady beat to jump to. And it scales from a small club to a 100,000-seat college stadium. Just masterful work.

AC/DC — “Thunderstruck”

Pretty much any AC/DC song works as a jock jam. The band has sounded pretty much the same through its career and through two frontmen. I’m really, really happy about that, because it’s a great sound that gets you hyped.

The hard part was picking the song. Do I want “Back in Black” for that classic opening riff? “It’s a Long Way to the Top (If You Wanna Rock ‘n’ Roll),” which is as good as its name is long? Yes, I want both of those. But if it’s as a jock jam, it’s gotta be “Thunderstruck.” It’s a versatile song in a football game and it’s a classic.

Guns N’ Roses — “Welcome to the Jungle”

There are a lot of jock jams, as it turns out. The well is pretty much bottomless. I’ve listed 12 of them in past columns and I hadn’t included “Welcome to the Jungle,” which seems like the most obvious pick in the world.

Unrelated to the topic: Is Guns N’ Roses underrated? I know they were one of the biggest bands in the world back in the ’80s, but do they get enough respect 35 years later? I say no, they don’t. You should respect Guns N’ Roses more.

Blur — “Song 2”

I love “Song 2” and I love Damon Albarn, but to this day I have no idea how Albarn ended up recording “Song 2.”

Blur was one of the major architects of ’90s Britpop, which famously sounds nothing like this song, and Albarn went on to be the creative force behind Gorillaz, whose sound is even farther apart from it. That really speaks highly of Albarn’s talent; that he can make music I enjoy in ways that sound nothing alike.

It’s also fun to listen to “Coffee & TV” and “Country House” and think, “this band recorded a stadium favorite.”

Darude — “Sandstorm”

Is this song a bit tacky? Yes. Is it such a perfect example of ’90s techno that it became a meme? Yes. Do I still enjoy the absolute heck out of it? Very hard yes.

It’s like that line in “Pirates of the Caribbean” where someone tells Jack Sparrow that he’s the worst pirate he’s ever heard of and Sparrow replies, “But you have heard of me.” Songs like “Sandstorm,” Santana’s “Smooth” and Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up” may be memes but there’s a reason they lasted long enough to achieve that status. They’re very good!

That’s right, I unashamedly enjoy meme songs. Come at me.

Follow publisher Daniel J. Willis and send column ideas to him at @bayareadata.press on BlueSky.