Insert Foot: What’s old is new, and what’s new is … Bennifer?

Bennifer, Jennifer Lopez, Ben Affleck

Bennifer is… back?

So Bennifer is a thing again. Tom Jones’ new record just hit No. 1 in Britain. “Mortal Kombat” is the No. 1 movie in America. Genesis just announced a reunion tour in the U.S.

Yes, that Genesis. Not in the biblical sense, though it’s not clear whether the book or the band is older.

Even the Rolling Stones winced at that one.

Well, OK. Perhaps, like Bennifer, we’re reaching for what we know. Why not? They say that youth is wasted on the young, and if the young don’t want to get off their iPhoneInstaTweeters long enough to create some riveting new art, the old people are going to fill the void.

Yes, it’s very true that Ben Affleck has been seen multiple times in the vicinity of things Jennifer Lopez owns not named Alex Rodriquez the past week, like her home and her vehicle. That obviously can mean only one thing: “Gigli 2!”

We’re not that bad off, yet. But … has anyone checked on the whereabouts of Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston?

And here we thought everyone wanted to get on with life. The weather is warming up, we’re getting vaccinated (some of us who aren’t still drinking the stupid). COVID-19 numbers are dropping in the U.S.

But then we turn on CNN and see the horror movie that is India right now, where they’re running out of firewood to cremate the dead. People are driving hundreds of miles to re-fill oxygen tanks, while others are being told they’re on their own to live or die on the sidewalk.

It’s still scary out there, so maybe it’s easiest to reach for what’s familiar. Maybe Joe Biden should run for President.

There’s definitely a pause in the music business, which everyone thought would be an all-out tsunami of new music and concert announcements by now. I do see musician friends dipping their toes back in the water, lining up a few shows and tours. Some have sent me new music I’m not necessarily supposed to talk about. Others, like Junkyard, I can talk about because Junkyard has simply decided to keep churning out some of the most reliable rock and roll on the planet.

Yeah … they’re pretty old. I knew them back when I could play drums without a heart monitor and paramedics standing by.

But many of us expected more by now and, instead of a rush back, the music business looks like a bunch of 13-year-old boys at the eighth grade dance, waiting to see who’s going to approach a real live girl first.

Well, except for 80-year-old Tom Jones. He and his tight polyester slacks are already out there, ducking underwear and shaking cans right off the shelf. Tom Jones may actually die some day and, when that happens, somebody’s going to have to officially notify his hips.

There are some serious opportunities out there right now for the next big thing to happen, once people are comfortable with new again. So much has changed the past year, it should be fascinating to see where the near future of the music industry goes. But we have to get there first. New is scary, and scary doesn’t necessarily have to be bad. Unless it’s “Gigli 2.”

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