Insert Foot a fan of Danny Trejo

Actor Danny Trejo has been sober for 55 years, as of last week. That’s a lot of sobriety. Especially to those of us who manage to stay straight for a year or two and wonder why we don’t get an anniversary parade.

I think Trejo’s feat is worth a toast … a piece of toast, in the shape of his face. Because he probably sells those somewhere. Trejo already sells his own tacos and doughnuts. Both are really good, too. Apparently he runs his own music label now.

The man is an American success story and should be celebrated.

Trejo said on social media this week, “I’m 55 years clean and sober today by the grace of God! I’ve done this one day at a time, and for anyone out there struggling YOU CAN TOO!”

Just for reference, 55 years is a long time. Lyndon Johnson was in the last year of his presidency 55 years ago. Computers were the size of starter homes.

Trejo’s sobriety is almost as old as me. I just turned 56 and my softball teammates keep pleading with me to use a pinch runner every time I get on base, because they’re afraid my heart will either explode or my legs will just crumple and vanish under me somewhere between second and third base.

In these days of whitewashing and dramatic and extreme interpretations of what it means to be an American, there may never have been a greater American success story than Danny Trejo.

The 79-year-old “Machete” actor was a convicted felon who straightened up in prison and started spreading the good word, when a movie honcho noticed he had the look of a … serious man.

OK, maybe a scary man. Which they need in movies.

According to CBS News, Trejo said in his memoir, “Trejo: My Life of Crime, Redemption, and Hollywood,” that he spent 11 years in and out of California prisons for a variety of crimes including armed robbery and drug dealing.

He had his ah-ha moment in 1968, he told CBS.

“I made a promise, ‘Lord if you let me die with dignity, I’ll say your name every day and I’ll do whatever you can for my fellow inmate.’ And I said inmate because I never thought I was getting out of prison.”

Trejo was born in L.A. to Mexican American parents. He was abused as a child, doing drugs by the time he was 8 (heroin by the time he was 12). His father took the family on the run because he was wanted for stabbing someone. Trejo was first arrested at age 10.

When he got out of prison in 1969, he became a drug counselor. He was visiting the set of 1985 Eric Roberts film “Runaway Train” to help a fellow addict when director Andrei Konchalovsky saw his muscley physique, tattoos and all-around badass aura, discovered he was a boxing champ at San Quentin, and put him in the ring with Roberts for the film. He was 41 at the time and has been in something like 400 movies and TV shows since.

And he stayed sober. That is his biggest feat, because none of the other stuff happens if he’s still lost in addiction.

He spent much of that time in Hollywood, which isn’t exactly a sober city. In fact, they have stands at the city limits, where they hand out free drinks when you come inside so you’re too busy drinking to notice how dirty Hollywood Boulevard is.

I’m 55 years clean and sober today by the grace of God! I’ve done this one day at a time, and for anyone out there struggling YOU CAN TOO! pic.twitter.com/iQvYKW2VkR

— Danny Trejo (@officialDannyT) August 23, 2023

Staying sober in Hollywood is like wrapping yourself in a meat suit, jumping into an alligator pit—and not getting bit. Hollywood is pressure, and pressure makes alcoholics drink. Everyone in Hollywood has an angle and is competing with everyone else, no matter how much they smile, shake your hand and sing your praises.

So while we look up to people who were born rich, got lucky, have egos bigger than Jupiter, won the genetic lottery or simply talk about their greatness until people start believing them, Trejo is truly the American rags to riches story. Because he understood what it took: a commitment to helping others is helping oneself.

“Everything good that has happened to me has happened as a direct result of helping someone else,” Trejo told CBS Mornings.

Put it on the calendar: Aug 23 is now Trejo Day. Party at my house next year, with tacos and doughnuts.

Follow music critic Tony Hicks at Twitter.com/TonyBaloney1967.